Tolerance
By Peter Quilligan
About three years ago, when I was a live-in Volunteer at Casa Maria Catholic Worker in Milwaukee, I was talking with a friend named Rosemarie. Rose was a retired Milwaukee public school teacher and part of the Casa Maria’s extending community for decades. She came over every Monday and Wednesday to sort, organize and distribute infant clothing to needy mothers. We were sitting at the dining room table eating lunch and Rose was complaining about the general lack of respect in the world these days. She said that there were no values anymore, that no one took any responsibility for their actions. “People act the way they do and we just have to tolerate it. All there is is tolerance.” I brushed it off as another one of Rose’s rants against anything modern and her own nostalgia for past generations. But ever since then, her statement has stayed in my mind.
I think of the work we do here, especially at the Storefront drop-in Center. We tolerate people who come in drunk and disorderly, often times men who sexually harass our other guest and volunteers. We patiently try to talk agitated guest out of fighting one another, or away from using profanity. Usually we will kick out the worst offenders for a week or a month or more. But they come back when their time is up and, more often than not, they get drunk, fight and disrespect the Storefront again and we continue to tolerate the behavior until we kick them out once again. Sometimes, I half jokingly say that if guilt brought me to the Catholic worker movement, then tolerance is what sustains me. However, I think tolerance often can be a natural manifestation of our call to non-violence and personalism.
This means that, unlike other meal sites or drop ins around town, we don’t hire security guards or Cleveland police with pistols hanging from their belts to supervise our Storefront. Seeing the dignity in all of our guests, we are unwilling to coerce anyone into good behavior with the threat of weaponry or the law. Instead, we are willing to tolerate a little more disorder in the hope that the most disrespectful guest will learn to respect the space for the sake of the other guests and the service provided. Instead of running to phone the police when arguments and conflicts arise, we tolerate a little more disorder in the hopes that we can be a peaceful presence as people get out their frustrations. Our guests are adults and if we remember that they have the rational power to settle differences, then our tolerance of the conflict is worth it. So when I think about my friend Rose grumbling that all there is is tolerance these days, I think she’s right. I also believe it’s the most challenging first tactic we must employ if we are serious about repairing our world which is so ravaged by capitalism, materialism and greed.
By Peter Quilligan
About three years ago, when I was a live-in Volunteer at Casa Maria Catholic Worker in Milwaukee, I was talking with a friend named Rosemarie. Rose was a retired Milwaukee public school teacher and part of the Casa Maria’s extending community for decades. She came over every Monday and Wednesday to sort, organize and distribute infant clothing to needy mothers. We were sitting at the dining room table eating lunch and Rose was complaining about the general lack of respect in the world these days. She said that there were no values anymore, that no one took any responsibility for their actions. “People act the way they do and we just have to tolerate it. All there is is tolerance.” I brushed it off as another one of Rose’s rants against anything modern and her own nostalgia for past generations. But ever since then, her statement has stayed in my mind.
I think of the work we do here, especially at the Storefront drop-in Center. We tolerate people who come in drunk and disorderly, often times men who sexually harass our other guest and volunteers. We patiently try to talk agitated guest out of fighting one another, or away from using profanity. Usually we will kick out the worst offenders for a week or a month or more. But they come back when their time is up and, more often than not, they get drunk, fight and disrespect the Storefront again and we continue to tolerate the behavior until we kick them out once again. Sometimes, I half jokingly say that if guilt brought me to the Catholic worker movement, then tolerance is what sustains me. However, I think tolerance often can be a natural manifestation of our call to non-violence and personalism.
This means that, unlike other meal sites or drop ins around town, we don’t hire security guards or Cleveland police with pistols hanging from their belts to supervise our Storefront. Seeing the dignity in all of our guests, we are unwilling to coerce anyone into good behavior with the threat of weaponry or the law. Instead, we are willing to tolerate a little more disorder in the hope that the most disrespectful guest will learn to respect the space for the sake of the other guests and the service provided. Instead of running to phone the police when arguments and conflicts arise, we tolerate a little more disorder in the hopes that we can be a peaceful presence as people get out their frustrations. Our guests are adults and if we remember that they have the rational power to settle differences, then our tolerance of the conflict is worth it. So when I think about my friend Rose grumbling that all there is is tolerance these days, I think she’s right. I also believe it’s the most challenging first tactic we must employ if we are serious about repairing our world which is so ravaged by capitalism, materialism and greed.
